Two and a half days of no help at all with 2 kids, one of whom is teething and one of whom had a stomach bug - and I am broken. I fell apart yesterday. Called everyone, no one answered, cried over the phone to my out-of-town husband... sobbed some more.
Eventually, my mom and my MIL came over and helped out. My mom cleaned up my house a bit while my MIL took the kids out to dinner and wore them out/kept them out of my hair. I still barely slept, but at least it was a rest AND some work got done around the house.
My mom, who had gotten off work early for the day under the guise of helping me out had "fallen asleep in the other room" and didn't hear her phone ringing. Seriously? And then she had the nerve to list all these errands she needed to do before coming over... I told my husband I was ready to smack her. He surmised that it was sort of like telling a starving person that they were late because they got caught up at the buffet line...
While the baby did sleep through the night, Fuss was up several times with tummy explosions throughout the night, so I still only scored about 5 hours (non-consecutive) of sleep.
I have also done something to my back and I'm hurting something awful. My sisters-in-law are taking Fuss for the bulk of the day today and I promised her we could have a movie night tonight after her nap. I need to get to Target to buy some toilet paper (among other things) and I have no idea when I'm going to get to that. I'm actually hoping I can convince my SIL to stay with the kids when she drops Fuss off so I can go alone. Right now, a few minutes of alone time sounds like heaven.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
I'm running on 7 hours of sleep total for the last 2 nights. None of it was consecutive. Please excuse me if this post makes less sense than usual.
Teething is of the Devil.
I'm so tired it hurts. I've never been this tired in my life.
I no longer care than my son is crying every time I leave the room. I know that is horrible, but I can't stand it any longer.
Teething is of the Devil.
I'm so tired it hurts. I've never been this tired in my life.
I no longer care than my son is crying every time I leave the room. I know that is horrible, but I can't stand it any longer.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
10 on Tuesday
1. What’s the recipe for your favorite drink? (Smoothie, alchoholic, coffee, whatever.)
Espresso Martini
Equal parts Van Gogh Double Espresso Vodka and Vanilla Vodka and half as much Kahlua. Serve chilled. Add espresso beans and or chocolate drizzle to garnish
2. What kind of razor do you use?
Venus
3. Who is your favorite Sesame Street character?
It was Grover growing up, but I don't know if he still is (was he as weird back then as he is now?) I like Cookie Monster and Abby Cadabby
4. What makes the perfect salad? (Lettuce type, toppings, dressing, etc.)
Spinach and romaine lettuce, tomatoes, mushrooms, celery, cheese, Italian dressing
5. What was your favorite subject in school?
English and American History.
6. What’s your favorite summer tradition?
My birthday!
7. Do you suffer from season allergies? How do you combat them?
Not really.
8. How often do you have to charge your cell phone?
Every other day or so.
9. Do you have a bucket list?
Not really. Most of the things that I would put on my list, I know I'll never have the opportunity to do!
10. Do you have any desire to go back to school?
I kinda hated school. I loved the social aspects of having people to talk to and I like to learn, but I hate taking tests and even when I was in art school and it was more about projects, I could never get things to come out the way I wanted them to... it was really frustrating. I would probably need to go back to school to have any sort of career in the future, but if I could skip it and get a good job without it? I would.
More 10 on Tuesday here.
Espresso Martini
Equal parts Van Gogh Double Espresso Vodka and Vanilla Vodka and half as much Kahlua. Serve chilled. Add espresso beans and or chocolate drizzle to garnish
2. What kind of razor do you use?
Venus
3. Who is your favorite Sesame Street character?
It was Grover growing up, but I don't know if he still is (was he as weird back then as he is now?) I like Cookie Monster and Abby Cadabby
4. What makes the perfect salad? (Lettuce type, toppings, dressing, etc.)
Spinach and romaine lettuce, tomatoes, mushrooms, celery, cheese, Italian dressing
5. What was your favorite subject in school?
English and American History.
6. What’s your favorite summer tradition?
My birthday!
7. Do you suffer from season allergies? How do you combat them?
Not really.
8. How often do you have to charge your cell phone?
Every other day or so.
9. Do you have a bucket list?
Not really. Most of the things that I would put on my list, I know I'll never have the opportunity to do!
10. Do you have any desire to go back to school?
I kinda hated school. I loved the social aspects of having people to talk to and I like to learn, but I hate taking tests and even when I was in art school and it was more about projects, I could never get things to come out the way I wanted them to... it was really frustrating. I would probably need to go back to school to have any sort of career in the future, but if I could skip it and get a good job without it? I would.
More 10 on Tuesday here.
Monday, June 27, 2011
M
MEDS - I've realized that my constant tiredness is a side-effect of the meds - there is a time period in the middle of the day where I can barely keep my eyes open. Before the meds, I was tired from lack of sleep and would have been willing to sleep all day to escape my life. Now, I'm having to fight to stay awake and I'm "self-medicating" with extra caffeine during the day and taking some mid-day naps when the kids are asleep. My friends assure me that I will adjust to it and not feel so sleepy soon. I can take it for a little while, though I do find it annoying!
MISSING MY HUSBAND - My husband left this morning for his week-long trip. I'm anxious about how things will go.
MOM - My mom was unreachable on Friday night and my Gramma got worried and called me. I started calling and texting both she and my step-dad. When my step-dad called me back, he said that she'd gone out at 4:00 with a co-worker "for a drink" and hadn't come home yet. He confessed that he was a little worried about her alcohol intake of late and she wouldn't talk to him about it. He told me the next day that they finally had a really good talk that afternoon about it and he's optimistic that things will improve. I'm still worried about her. I don't know what to say to her if anything at all.
MISSING MY HUSBAND - My husband left this morning for his week-long trip. I'm anxious about how things will go.
MOM - My mom was unreachable on Friday night and my Gramma got worried and called me. I started calling and texting both she and my step-dad. When my step-dad called me back, he said that she'd gone out at 4:00 with a co-worker "for a drink" and hadn't come home yet. He confessed that he was a little worried about her alcohol intake of late and she wouldn't talk to him about it. He told me the next day that they finally had a really good talk that afternoon about it and he's optimistic that things will improve. I'm still worried about her. I don't know what to say to her if anything at all.
Friday, June 24, 2011
Quick Takes - I need sleep
1. We might be looking for a new church some time soon. We love the pastor that teaches our Sunday School class, but we rarely ever attend the worship service. At our old church, we loved the worship service, but there were no Sunday School classes or small groups that we really fit in (plus, there was the incident where we ran the Youth Group and got burned out and abruptly unseated after a couple of years and very little thanks... which is the reason we ultimately left that church, where I grew up and where we were married.) But it is SO hard to find a church home.
2. I HATE birth control pills. Here I am, 2 weeks after my last period, and I'm having another one.
3. I want to sleep. I want to sleep for a week. I am so tired. And my husband is leaving for a business trip next week, so it isn't getting better.
4. I'm so tired, I don't even want to put forth the effort to go over to my best friend's house today as planned. This is a surefire indication that there is something wrong with me - I haven't been out of the house all week. Usually I am craving social interactions.
5. Fuss peed in her bed last night and I had to move her to the couch because it leaked through to the mattress. After dealing with that at 4:00, she woke at 5:30 to tell us she was hungry. We sent her back to the couch, but then she got up again at 6:00.
6. The baby was up several times before that. As a matter of fact, he woke up just before 11 and thought it was play time.
7. I'm so tired, I'm not even thinking straight.
2. I HATE birth control pills. Here I am, 2 weeks after my last period, and I'm having another one.
3. I want to sleep. I want to sleep for a week. I am so tired. And my husband is leaving for a business trip next week, so it isn't getting better.
4. I'm so tired, I don't even want to put forth the effort to go over to my best friend's house today as planned. This is a surefire indication that there is something wrong with me - I haven't been out of the house all week. Usually I am craving social interactions.
5. Fuss peed in her bed last night and I had to move her to the couch because it leaked through to the mattress. After dealing with that at 4:00, she woke at 5:30 to tell us she was hungry. We sent her back to the couch, but then she got up again at 6:00.
6. The baby was up several times before that. As a matter of fact, he woke up just before 11 and thought it was play time.
7. I'm so tired, I'm not even thinking straight.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Rough day
Wednesday wasn't a good day. The baby woke at 4, ate and refused to go back to sleep. I had a headache and really didn't want to get up and my husband was up anyway, so he stayed up with him. I took some medicine and went back to bed. I didn't want to get up at 7 when he came in to wake me because my head was still hurting.
My emotions ran the gamut for the next few hours from being motivated to get a bunch of stuff done to wanting to cry because my mom was being difficult. I then felt like I hit a brick wall and all I wanted to do for the next couple of hours was sleep. I couldn't since the kids were up, but oh, how I wanted to. Thought about calling my SIL and telling her I had a headache to get her to take Fuss for awhile, but I still wouldn't have been able to sleep because of the baby and after the other day, I really didn't want to ask her to watch them again any time soon.
Things got a little better later, but I still struggled for the better part of the afternoon. I had some stomach issues toward the end of nap time (I didn't get one, but the kids did) but I was certainly glad that my husband was able to come home at a reasonable hour.
This morning, I woke up early (decided to let my husband sleep in since he was up late with an upset stomach), fed the baby and then discovered some bleeding when I went to the bathroom. Without going in to too much detail, it was red, thick, clotty and a lot heavier than my past experiences with breakthrough bleeding. Freaked me out, though the internet says that breakthrough bleeding can be heavy.
My emotions ran the gamut for the next few hours from being motivated to get a bunch of stuff done to wanting to cry because my mom was being difficult. I then felt like I hit a brick wall and all I wanted to do for the next couple of hours was sleep. I couldn't since the kids were up, but oh, how I wanted to. Thought about calling my SIL and telling her I had a headache to get her to take Fuss for awhile, but I still wouldn't have been able to sleep because of the baby and after the other day, I really didn't want to ask her to watch them again any time soon.
Things got a little better later, but I still struggled for the better part of the afternoon. I had some stomach issues toward the end of nap time (I didn't get one, but the kids did) but I was certainly glad that my husband was able to come home at a reasonable hour.
This morning, I woke up early (decided to let my husband sleep in since he was up late with an upset stomach), fed the baby and then discovered some bleeding when I went to the bathroom. Without going in to too much detail, it was red, thick, clotty and a lot heavier than my past experiences with breakthrough bleeding. Freaked me out, though the internet says that breakthrough bleeding can be heavy.
Better... maybe
I seem to waffle back and forth between feeling a little better - being more in control of my thoughts and feelings and not so overwhelmed with my life - and wanting to just wallow in the sadness/misery/depression. There are moments when I start to consider having a couple of drinks or taking some sort of pill to make me float through my day. I don't. But sometimes, I'd like to.
Is this normal? Is this really what depression feels like? Or am I going crazy? Or am I just being overly dramatic because everyone feels this way at some point or another?
The anger has been under control with one exception - or maybe 2. I got really angry the other day when Fuss lied to me (direct lies, to my face, twice) and then disobeyed when I tried to doll out her punishment and then ran away when I moved closer to her to give her her punishment. I spanked her several times and I was angry and I know I scared her. I hate that I scare her sometimes.
And then my SIL started butting into our family business the other day - I'm not going into details here because I need to just let it go, but suffice it to say she brought up a presumed slight to my husband and was all "holier than thou" about stuff and it just really PISSED ME OFF. I didn't do anything but tell my husband that I didn't want to talk about it any more and bang around the kitchen doing dishes. (So, a productive use of my anger, I guess!)
Is this normal? Is this really what depression feels like? Or am I going crazy? Or am I just being overly dramatic because everyone feels this way at some point or another?
The anger has been under control with one exception - or maybe 2. I got really angry the other day when Fuss lied to me (direct lies, to my face, twice) and then disobeyed when I tried to doll out her punishment and then ran away when I moved closer to her to give her her punishment. I spanked her several times and I was angry and I know I scared her. I hate that I scare her sometimes.
And then my SIL started butting into our family business the other day - I'm not going into details here because I need to just let it go, but suffice it to say she brought up a presumed slight to my husband and was all "holier than thou" about stuff and it just really PISSED ME OFF. I didn't do anything but tell my husband that I didn't want to talk about it any more and bang around the kitchen doing dishes. (So, a productive use of my anger, I guess!)
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
The Perfect.... 10 on Tuesday
Provided by Ashley D at That Super Awesome Blog.
1. What’s the perfect meal?
Depends on my mood, but probably some sort of seafood pasta.
2. What are the perfect pair of shoes?
Something that is both cute and comfortable. I have yet to find the perfect pair of shoes. I've come close, though.
3. What is the perfect afternoon?
Right now, the perfect afternoon would involve 2 kids napping for several hours while I got both a nap and some time to watch TV or read a book.
4. What’s the perfect house?
I love my house, but if money were no object, there are some things I'd change. I'd love to have more bedrooms and a dedicated office space that could be closed off and I NEED more bathrooms. (We have only one.) I'd love a fireplace and a bigger kitchen.
5. What is the perfect outfit?
Again, depends on my mood, but something that makes me feel pretty, sexy and comfortable.
6. What’s the perfect wedding song?
The song that reminds me of my wedding is "When You Say Nothing At All" and I love it.
7. What is the perfect job?
Something that involves both reading and writing that is flexible and also has some social/professional interactions.
8. What’s the perfect hairstyle?
Something cute and stylish that is also easy to maintain and gives me some versatility options. I hate doing the same thing day in and day out.
9. What’s the perfect music festival?
I have no idea. My music selections these days run the gamut from Disney show tunes to preschool sunday school songs to the Glee soundtrack. They don't make music festivals for that.
10. What’s the perfect day to yourself?
Leisurely breakfast and a small cafe, pedicure, shopping, nap, reading a book and joining my husband or some friends for an amazing dinner and cocktails.
It's nice to dream, isn't it?
Monday, June 20, 2011
Monday's weekend in review
Blogger just ate my post. Grrr.
So - in review - great anniversary - wonderful dinner out - kids stayed up way too late with my mom and neither was asleep when we got home after 10:30. So yeah, my mom had some babysitting struggles.
Father's Day was good. My husband let me sleep in, made breakfast, took us to lunch and the wine store, let me get a nap, made dinner (I helped, but he did it) and helped me work on my organizing project by helping me completely reorganize our gigantic bookshelf and we've officially begun our reorganize and downsize project for the summer. So yay!
Feeling better about things... the hormones in the BCP must be helping, and I'm beginning to adjust to the Zoloft... I think. I dunno. Today I'm feeling more sleepy and foggy than usual. But! Yesterday I didn't have one of those awful, horrible headaches for the first time in a week, so that's progress!
So - in review - great anniversary - wonderful dinner out - kids stayed up way too late with my mom and neither was asleep when we got home after 10:30. So yeah, my mom had some babysitting struggles.
Father's Day was good. My husband let me sleep in, made breakfast, took us to lunch and the wine store, let me get a nap, made dinner (I helped, but he did it) and helped me work on my organizing project by helping me completely reorganize our gigantic bookshelf and we've officially begun our reorganize and downsize project for the summer. So yay!
Feeling better about things... the hormones in the BCP must be helping, and I'm beginning to adjust to the Zoloft... I think. I dunno. Today I'm feeling more sleepy and foggy than usual. But! Yesterday I didn't have one of those awful, horrible headaches for the first time in a week, so that's progress!
Happy Father's Day
My husband is awesome. On Father's day he let ME sleep in. He made breakfast, he took us out to lunch and then to the wine store. He helped me reorganize the big bookshelf in our living room, which I've been wanting to do since I was pregnant last summer. We've begun the clean up and clear out portion of my summer project of reorganizing and downsizing. He made dinner, too. (I helped, but we were in the mood for one of the meals that was really more his forte, so he did it.) He even let me take a nap. (He relaxed, too, by watching some stupid movie on Netflix, but at least I didn't have to watch it!) He played with his kids and spent time with me. We had one thing we had to pick up at the store and when he declared that he really had no interest in going out to get it, I went to the grocery store by myself while he stayed home with the kids.
It was also our anniversary this weekend. Six years of married happiness! We went to a beautiful dinner on Saturday night and while we stayed out late enough that the kids should have been sound asleep when we returned, they weren't. The Little Man doesn't do so well on the bottle. Oops.
It was also our anniversary this weekend. Six years of married happiness! We went to a beautiful dinner on Saturday night and while we stayed out late enough that the kids should have been sound asleep when we returned, they weren't. The Little Man doesn't do so well on the bottle. Oops.
Friday, June 17, 2011
1. Liz made the comment at my appointment the other day about how they use sleep deprivation on prisoners of war, etc. I've read that before, but I think I read it as this humorous little anecdote that they put in the books about the early days of having a baby at home to remind you that you are cranky, but it will get better. But I'm now taking it more seriously. My kids have it in for me and if sleep is what I need to get better - get back to "normal," to be more balanced, then... well, I just don't know how to get there living in this house. (not that I'm planning to leave or anything, but my kids are both causing troubles in the sleep arena lately.)
2. My house is a mess. I've been planning on my summer project being to weed out and re-organize, but I've had some other things to deal with and now we're halfway through June and I haven't begun. I need a bunch of boxes. It's donation time, ladies and gentlemen. I am DONE with the overflow of junk.
3. Busytown Mysteries and Go, Diego, Go have been a joy on Netflix. My daughter is always willing to watch one of those shows and mostly they don't annoy me to insanity.
4. My son has attached himself to his blankie that I made him. This is wonderful on one hand, because it means he's got a comfort object AND that it's something I made him, but on the other hand, I was going to try and make him a lighter-weight lovie and I can't find the spare supplies for the copy of the one I already made him, so I can't seem to get him to let go of this one long enough to clean it.
5. Sometimes in the middle of the night when I'm rocking the baby back to sleep (again) he snuggles up to me and I swear, he's trying to share my skin.
6. Tomorrow is my anniversary. We've been married 6 years. I'm looking forward to a night out with my wonderful husband.
7. The newest picture of my kids together is amazingly beautiful to me.
Happy Weekend!
For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary.
2. My house is a mess. I've been planning on my summer project being to weed out and re-organize, but I've had some other things to deal with and now we're halfway through June and I haven't begun. I need a bunch of boxes. It's donation time, ladies and gentlemen. I am DONE with the overflow of junk.
3. Busytown Mysteries and Go, Diego, Go have been a joy on Netflix. My daughter is always willing to watch one of those shows and mostly they don't annoy me to insanity.
4. My son has attached himself to his blankie that I made him. This is wonderful on one hand, because it means he's got a comfort object AND that it's something I made him, but on the other hand, I was going to try and make him a lighter-weight lovie and I can't find the spare supplies for the copy of the one I already made him, so I can't seem to get him to let go of this one long enough to clean it.
5. Sometimes in the middle of the night when I'm rocking the baby back to sleep (again) he snuggles up to me and I swear, he's trying to share my skin.
6. Tomorrow is my anniversary. We've been married 6 years. I'm looking forward to a night out with my wonderful husband.
7. The newest picture of my kids together is amazingly beautiful to me.
Happy Weekend!
For more Quick Takes, visit Conversion Diary.
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Headaches
Somewhere around mid-morning every day, I get a blistering, blinding headache. I described it as my face feeling like it was on fire. It pounds and aches and throbs and hurts so bad I want to put a knife in my head to cut off the hurting part. I take Tylenol and it does NOTHING. Sometimes I take Excedrin Migraine which dulls it, but I'm not supposed to take a ton of that while nursing.
I bribe Fuss with snacks and Netflix movies and usually the baby is asleep or willing to go down around this time, so I can curl up and moan quietly for a few minutes. It's awful. Not even my daily dose of caffeine is helping anymore. I don't think this is a caffeine headache. But I don't know what it IS. Is it my teeth? Because that's part of the pain. It is my neck/shoulder that is so tight? Is it the stress I've been dealing with? Whatever it is, I'm hoping it gets resolved soon, because this is awful.
I'm tired. My first pill made me nauseous and I was still incredibly grumpy all day. (Of course. I didn't really expect to have it be a miracle pill that cured me of the bad attitude in mere hours. But it's like now I'm more aware of it - that I shouldn't be feeling this way - and it makes it both better and worse at the same time.)
I bribe Fuss with snacks and Netflix movies and usually the baby is asleep or willing to go down around this time, so I can curl up and moan quietly for a few minutes. It's awful. Not even my daily dose of caffeine is helping anymore. I don't think this is a caffeine headache. But I don't know what it IS. Is it my teeth? Because that's part of the pain. It is my neck/shoulder that is so tight? Is it the stress I've been dealing with? Whatever it is, I'm hoping it gets resolved soon, because this is awful.
I'm tired. My first pill made me nauseous and I was still incredibly grumpy all day. (Of course. I didn't really expect to have it be a miracle pill that cured me of the bad attitude in mere hours. But it's like now I'm more aware of it - that I shouldn't be feeling this way - and it makes it both better and worse at the same time.)
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
A bottle of potential sanity
So yesterday I had my appointment with my OBGYN, Liz. We actually started talking about how long I've been her patient - and seeing as I met her when she was at another practice, it's apparently been at least 12-13 years, which surprised me. She reminds me of my sisterfriend, in that she is friendly and nice and energetic and you just want to be her friend.
Anyhow, as we checked in everyone kept asking "what are you here for?" as part of the questions for check in. I didn't really feel like telling every person in the office that I felt like I was going crazy, so I just told them "birth control." Now, that is true, as I've finally succumbed to going back on the pill, but I would have probably waited a little longer if that was it.
Liz was awesome as usual. I wasn't planning to do a full exam, but they pointed out that it's been over a year since my last Well-woman visit (they did a pelvic exam at my postpartum appointment, but no pap, etc.) so despite the fact that my husband was there, I got the whole once-over. (Not that my husband can't be there, but it's usually something I do on my own.) She listened well to my issues. She said she thought that it truly might be more sleep deprivation more than anything else, that that can really mess up your hormones and your thinking, etc. She put me on a steady dose birth control pill which may help (low dose because of the breastfeeding) and also a low dose of antidepressant. So I'm on Lo Estrin and Zoloft for now and we shall see how things go. I go back in 6 weeks, which should be plenty of time to see a difference.
She had to ask if I had any plans to kill myself, because if I did, then she would have to Baker Act me (a state-thing that means committed for 72 hours) Which I of course told her no. Although, I have to say that there seems to be some appeal to the idea of having 72 hours off and sleeping. But I don't really relish the idea of doing that in a mental ward, so...
We came home and my husband had me take a nap while Fuss napped. That was probably a good thing since we had yet another horrible night with the baby. My husband helped a lot, but he is a heavy sleeper and I truly don't see the point in both of us being up when I'm the one who hears him most of the time.
So I started my pills this morning. I'm taking half a pill for the first week and then I'll up it to a full pill. But it could take 2-4 weeks for it to really take effect, though she said the BCP might have an effect before that if it's just a mild hormone issue.
So, here's hoping. I don't know how I let things get this messed up. Some of the thoughts I've been having lately - including the desire to drink during the day (I never, ever have an alcoholic beverage without my husband being home. I won't put my kids at risk in case of emergencies.) and float through life a little numb. When did I become this way? In my saner moments, I know that that makes no sense!
Anyhow, as we checked in everyone kept asking "what are you here for?" as part of the questions for check in. I didn't really feel like telling every person in the office that I felt like I was going crazy, so I just told them "birth control." Now, that is true, as I've finally succumbed to going back on the pill, but I would have probably waited a little longer if that was it.
Liz was awesome as usual. I wasn't planning to do a full exam, but they pointed out that it's been over a year since my last Well-woman visit (they did a pelvic exam at my postpartum appointment, but no pap, etc.) so despite the fact that my husband was there, I got the whole once-over. (Not that my husband can't be there, but it's usually something I do on my own.) She listened well to my issues. She said she thought that it truly might be more sleep deprivation more than anything else, that that can really mess up your hormones and your thinking, etc. She put me on a steady dose birth control pill which may help (low dose because of the breastfeeding) and also a low dose of antidepressant. So I'm on Lo Estrin and Zoloft for now and we shall see how things go. I go back in 6 weeks, which should be plenty of time to see a difference.
She had to ask if I had any plans to kill myself, because if I did, then she would have to Baker Act me (a state-thing that means committed for 72 hours) Which I of course told her no. Although, I have to say that there seems to be some appeal to the idea of having 72 hours off and sleeping. But I don't really relish the idea of doing that in a mental ward, so...
We came home and my husband had me take a nap while Fuss napped. That was probably a good thing since we had yet another horrible night with the baby. My husband helped a lot, but he is a heavy sleeper and I truly don't see the point in both of us being up when I'm the one who hears him most of the time.
So I started my pills this morning. I'm taking half a pill for the first week and then I'll up it to a full pill. But it could take 2-4 weeks for it to really take effect, though she said the BCP might have an effect before that if it's just a mild hormone issue.
So, here's hoping. I don't know how I let things get this messed up. Some of the thoughts I've been having lately - including the desire to drink during the day (I never, ever have an alcoholic beverage without my husband being home. I won't put my kids at risk in case of emergencies.) and float through life a little numb. When did I become this way? In my saner moments, I know that that makes no sense!
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
10 on Tuesday
1. How do you pronounce the word aunt? Does your pronunciation rhyme with ‘haunt’ or ‘can’t'?
When I say it by itself, I typically say it as rhyming with "haunt", but if paired with a name - especially when talking to my daughter about her "Aunts", it comes out closer to "can't". I had an English teacher in school who used to insist that "ants" are little bugs that run around on the ground.
2. Do most of the people in your life know you blog? Or are you partially or totally anonymous?
I'm mostly anonymous.
3. When you grocery shop, do you prefer to bag your own groceries or do you like it when the store bags them for you? Paper, plastic, or reusable bags?
I prefer them to bag, traditionally use plastic bags, but I'd use reusable if A) I had enough reuseable bags to make it work, B) I remembered to bring my reusable bags, C) My husband would let me buy some reusable bags to use. I have a handful, all given as gifts by my mom or as promos from some store or another. But not nearly enough to do my grocery shopping.
4. Do you have a green thumb?
When I remember to work on my plants, they do very well. That tends so come in phases. I've had some amazing success with Dahlia bulbs that I once had a master gardener tell me I wouldn't be able to grow in this FL heat. (ha!) These gorgeous, crimson bulbs lasted all spring and most of the summer because I watered them daily. But with this heat, if you forget 1-2 days, your flowers are done for.
5. If you watch the Food Network, which chef/show host is your favorite?
I rarely watch FN. And right now, the only shows I can think of are Rachael Ray and Paula Dean, not so much because I watch them, but because they are well-known.
6. Do you like to take baths? Do you take them very often?
Sometimes I'm in a mood for a bath. I don't get one often. There being only one bathroom in our house really prevents anyone from hogging it long-term and expecting any privacy. And if I'm taking a bath, I want it to be relaxing.
7. What color are the walls in your kitchen?
Pale ice blue.
8. Do you prefer to dine outdoors or indoors?
INDOORS. God allowed man to invent air conditioning for a reason.
9. Describe your ideal weather.
High of 75 and sunny. We get maybe a week of that per year here.
10. If you could learn any foreign language, which would you choose to learn?
Italian maybe? Just for fun. Spanish for practicality. Of course, there's a debate around here about whether Spanish should be considered a "foreign" language, since there is a large Spanish-speaking community in the state of FL. :)
When I say it by itself, I typically say it as rhyming with "haunt", but if paired with a name - especially when talking to my daughter about her "Aunts", it comes out closer to "can't". I had an English teacher in school who used to insist that "ants" are little bugs that run around on the ground.
2. Do most of the people in your life know you blog? Or are you partially or totally anonymous?
I'm mostly anonymous.
3. When you grocery shop, do you prefer to bag your own groceries or do you like it when the store bags them for you? Paper, plastic, or reusable bags?
I prefer them to bag, traditionally use plastic bags, but I'd use reusable if A) I had enough reuseable bags to make it work, B) I remembered to bring my reusable bags, C) My husband would let me buy some reusable bags to use. I have a handful, all given as gifts by my mom or as promos from some store or another. But not nearly enough to do my grocery shopping.
4. Do you have a green thumb?
When I remember to work on my plants, they do very well. That tends so come in phases. I've had some amazing success with Dahlia bulbs that I once had a master gardener tell me I wouldn't be able to grow in this FL heat. (ha!) These gorgeous, crimson bulbs lasted all spring and most of the summer because I watered them daily. But with this heat, if you forget 1-2 days, your flowers are done for.
5. If you watch the Food Network, which chef/show host is your favorite?
I rarely watch FN. And right now, the only shows I can think of are Rachael Ray and Paula Dean, not so much because I watch them, but because they are well-known.
6. Do you like to take baths? Do you take them very often?
Sometimes I'm in a mood for a bath. I don't get one often. There being only one bathroom in our house really prevents anyone from hogging it long-term and expecting any privacy. And if I'm taking a bath, I want it to be relaxing.
7. What color are the walls in your kitchen?
Pale ice blue.
8. Do you prefer to dine outdoors or indoors?
INDOORS. God allowed man to invent air conditioning for a reason.
9. Describe your ideal weather.
High of 75 and sunny. We get maybe a week of that per year here.
10. If you could learn any foreign language, which would you choose to learn?
Italian maybe? Just for fun. Spanish for practicality. Of course, there's a debate around here about whether Spanish should be considered a "foreign" language, since there is a large Spanish-speaking community in the state of FL. :)
Monday, June 13, 2011
Ka boom
I'm not sure what happened this week. But Friday night, Daddy Fuss and I sat down to have a talk after an argument earlier and putting it aside long enough to eat and put the kids to bed...
We both had our complaints. We both shed a few tears, aired frustrations. And ultimately, I ended up confessing that after 3 and a half days of not even getting out of the house as far as the mailbox, then having an argument with him, etc. I had (briefly, fleetingly) thought about how my family would be better off if I weren't alive and had (briefly, fleetingly) considered the options of killing myself. (I had subsequently rejected such ideas, of course)
Now, don't get me wrong. That's a big deal. But I felt that the bigger part of my ranting was me crying over and over "I'm worthless, I'm useless. I can't do anything." But he seemed completely stuck on the other thing and asked me several times how long I'd felt that way, commented that he didn't realize things were this bad, etc. But I've said this before. I've told him I've felt worthless before. I don't know what else I can really say - for an incredbly sensitive, caring, wonderful man - well, I guess I don't feel he's been listening.
He had me make an appointment to see my GYN (tomorrow, 1:30) to see what sort of help I can get. I'm still within the boundaries (one year) for postpartum depression, so we're assuming this is that. We went through a checklist we found online the other night, and I had between 8-9 out of 10 of the symptoms. (one of them I didn't think described me all the time, but sometimes.)
Things have been bad. I've lost my appetite for food and for sex. I want to socialize, but sometimes I feel like it's not worth the effort. (for example, my best friend invited us over for a swim/burgers and dogs on the grill yesterday and when we were nearly ready to go, I was like "do we really have to go?" which is totally not like me at all.
I'm scared of the idea of pills though, because I feel like they might be a slippery slope - sure they can help me feel better now, but what happens later? When do I get off of them? When will it be over?
So, I'm going to see Liz tomorrow and I'll see what the options are. I'm not sure how I feel about it, but I know that I need some help. I wish I could just have my husband home more, have some help with the kids, etc. but that isn't a viable option right now, so we'll see what happens.
We both had our complaints. We both shed a few tears, aired frustrations. And ultimately, I ended up confessing that after 3 and a half days of not even getting out of the house as far as the mailbox, then having an argument with him, etc. I had (briefly, fleetingly) thought about how my family would be better off if I weren't alive and had (briefly, fleetingly) considered the options of killing myself. (I had subsequently rejected such ideas, of course)
Now, don't get me wrong. That's a big deal. But I felt that the bigger part of my ranting was me crying over and over "I'm worthless, I'm useless. I can't do anything." But he seemed completely stuck on the other thing and asked me several times how long I'd felt that way, commented that he didn't realize things were this bad, etc. But I've said this before. I've told him I've felt worthless before. I don't know what else I can really say - for an incredbly sensitive, caring, wonderful man - well, I guess I don't feel he's been listening.
He had me make an appointment to see my GYN (tomorrow, 1:30) to see what sort of help I can get. I'm still within the boundaries (one year) for postpartum depression, so we're assuming this is that. We went through a checklist we found online the other night, and I had between 8-9 out of 10 of the symptoms. (one of them I didn't think described me all the time, but sometimes.)
Things have been bad. I've lost my appetite for food and for sex. I want to socialize, but sometimes I feel like it's not worth the effort. (for example, my best friend invited us over for a swim/burgers and dogs on the grill yesterday and when we were nearly ready to go, I was like "do we really have to go?" which is totally not like me at all.
I'm scared of the idea of pills though, because I feel like they might be a slippery slope - sure they can help me feel better now, but what happens later? When do I get off of them? When will it be over?
So, I'm going to see Liz tomorrow and I'll see what the options are. I'm not sure how I feel about it, but I know that I need some help. I wish I could just have my husband home more, have some help with the kids, etc. but that isn't a viable option right now, so we'll see what happens.
Friday, June 10, 2011
Quick Takes that took all day
1. Another day, another headache. Did I mention that after 50 days without a period, I finally got mine again? This breast feeding cycle really sucks. And the hormonal headaches are seriously trying to kill me.
2. I've been playing with some digital designs for cards/invitations and I'm hoping to open my own Etsy shop. Stay tuned for updates.
3. My mother-in-law bought us a (groupon) kayaking session for two for Christmas. I am SO not an outdoorsy type and if I wanted to go kayaking - ever - I'd go w/ my mom who loves kayaking so much she owns her own. But anyhow, we're going this weekend. Yip. Eee. (Cancelled due to availability.)
4. We're also getting together with our best friends this weekend. My best friend and her husband and kids. There is a new member of the family that we haven't met yes - my best friend's 13-year-old step-son (who is now starting to have a relationship with his dad for the first time) so that should be interesting. We haven't hung out with theme since April, so it will be nice to see them and hang out for awhile.
5. I think I might have finally decided on a theme for Little Man's birthday - and it's not really a theme. I picked the colors and it's a bunch of shapes for the card I designed. I think we'll take the idea of the "block" party and make all the food standard shapes (squares, circles, triangles, etc.) I need to get my husband to sign off on it, but I think he'll be fine.
6. Bought a groupon deal for family pictures. I'm psyched. The photographer is a friend I went to art school with (who I lost track of over the last 3 years or so) and her portfolio is awesome. I cannot wait to do this. I have been wanting some beautiful, creative family pictures for ages and this came as a great deal, plus the added bonus of Tracy being a friend.
7. I am looking for an all-to-mostly satin, lightweight blanket for Little Man. I cannot find anything like that even on Etsy. Everyone has a lot of the fluffy/furry/fleecey/minky stuff with a little bit of satin, but he LOVES the feel of satin and just gets SO hot with the heavier stuff on the blanket. I'm thinking about contracting a friend who just opened her own Etsy store who is a great sewer to do it so that it's nicer than my skill level, but I don't know how much she'll charge and I can't afford a lot.
2. I've been playing with some digital designs for cards/invitations and I'm hoping to open my own Etsy shop. Stay tuned for updates.
3. My mother-in-law bought us a (groupon) kayaking session for two for Christmas. I am SO not an outdoorsy type and if I wanted to go kayaking - ever - I'd go w/ my mom who loves kayaking so much she owns her own. But anyhow, we're going this weekend. Yip. Eee. (Cancelled due to availability.)
4. We're also getting together with our best friends this weekend. My best friend and her husband and kids. There is a new member of the family that we haven't met yes - my best friend's 13-year-old step-son (who is now starting to have a relationship with his dad for the first time) so that should be interesting. We haven't hung out with theme since April, so it will be nice to see them and hang out for awhile.
5. I think I might have finally decided on a theme for Little Man's birthday - and it's not really a theme. I picked the colors and it's a bunch of shapes for the card I designed. I think we'll take the idea of the "block" party and make all the food standard shapes (squares, circles, triangles, etc.) I need to get my husband to sign off on it, but I think he'll be fine.
6. Bought a groupon deal for family pictures. I'm psyched. The photographer is a friend I went to art school with (who I lost track of over the last 3 years or so) and her portfolio is awesome. I cannot wait to do this. I have been wanting some beautiful, creative family pictures for ages and this came as a great deal, plus the added bonus of Tracy being a friend.
7. I am looking for an all-to-mostly satin, lightweight blanket for Little Man. I cannot find anything like that even on Etsy. Everyone has a lot of the fluffy/furry/fleecey/minky stuff with a little bit of satin, but he LOVES the feel of satin and just gets SO hot with the heavier stuff on the blanket. I'm thinking about contracting a friend who just opened her own Etsy store who is a great sewer to do it so that it's nicer than my skill level, but I don't know how much she'll charge and I can't afford a lot.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Baby birthdays
My baby boy is 9 months old. I'm trying to plan his first birthday party and I'm STUCK. When Fuss was turning one, I had all these ideas for a theme. It was pink and green and was "Sweet Pea" themed. I handmade the invitations and I made the cake, I cleaned the decorated the house and we had all these people over for a party.
I cannot find a theme that I like, that works for my son's first birthday. Or rather, I can't find one I like that my husband also likes and I'm not in love with it enough to fight for it...
?
I'm scouring the internet. I've already booked a shelter at my favorite park, and I'm willing to make the invitations myself - as a matter of fact, I've been designing things and playing with ideas for days, even though I don't have a theme, so I don't really know what I want anyhow! Why is there no cute baby boy themes? Why does it all have to be Elmo and Dinosaurs?
I've thought about doing a Cookie Monster theme because I've made some really cute Cookie Monster cupcakes in the past, and I thought - hey! I can do that!
I kind of wanted to do a sailboat/nautical theme because that was one of my top choices for a boy-specific nursery theme that I didn't get to do because we were being smart! responsible! and went gender-neutral.
I've considered Cowboy, blocks, baby ducks, cupcakes and donuts. I'm afraid that cupcakes will be too much pressure when I go to make the cake/cupcakes. All the donut ideas seem to be PINK.
So, what to do?
I cannot find a theme that I like, that works for my son's first birthday. Or rather, I can't find one I like that my husband also likes and I'm not in love with it enough to fight for it...
?
I'm scouring the internet. I've already booked a shelter at my favorite park, and I'm willing to make the invitations myself - as a matter of fact, I've been designing things and playing with ideas for days, even though I don't have a theme, so I don't really know what I want anyhow! Why is there no cute baby boy themes? Why does it all have to be Elmo and Dinosaurs?
I've thought about doing a Cookie Monster theme because I've made some really cute Cookie Monster cupcakes in the past, and I thought - hey! I can do that!
I kind of wanted to do a sailboat/nautical theme because that was one of my top choices for a boy-specific nursery theme that I didn't get to do because we were being smart! responsible! and went gender-neutral.
I've considered Cowboy, blocks, baby ducks, cupcakes and donuts. I'm afraid that cupcakes will be too much pressure when I go to make the cake/cupcakes. All the donut ideas seem to be PINK.
So, what to do?
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
Bad night, rough morning
The Little Man spiked a fever out of the blue last night - no sniffles, no congestion, just fever and fussiness. I should have known something was up when he slept for 2 hours in the morning and nearly 3 hours in the afternoon nap.
I was supposed to meet up with an old friend (she likes to emphasize the *old* as she's 9 years older than me) today, but with the sick baby and her big group of kids (she has 6 and she's pregnant with number 7) I just don't want to risk exposing anyone to anything, especially since I have no idea what he picked up and why he's feverish. I'm hoping my SIL who has been out of town (out of the country actually) will come by and see the kids and give me at least a bit of a break.
Because of the baby not feeling well, neither my husband or I got a lot of sleep last night. And this morning, we over slept and had a few little disagreements. He drank the last little tiny bit of milk last night with his cookies. Which I had been saving for Fuss's cereal this morning. But he didn't tell me he drank the rest of it, so I had poured her cereal before I knew there was no more milk. I was irritated.
Because of that, he decided that today was a bad day to take the car to the mechanic's after all... I just said "whatever you want." I'm sort of over it.
I was supposed to meet up with an old friend (she likes to emphasize the *old* as she's 9 years older than me) today, but with the sick baby and her big group of kids (she has 6 and she's pregnant with number 7) I just don't want to risk exposing anyone to anything, especially since I have no idea what he picked up and why he's feverish. I'm hoping my SIL who has been out of town (out of the country actually) will come by and see the kids and give me at least a bit of a break.
Because of the baby not feeling well, neither my husband or I got a lot of sleep last night. And this morning, we over slept and had a few little disagreements. He drank the last little tiny bit of milk last night with his cookies. Which I had been saving for Fuss's cereal this morning. But he didn't tell me he drank the rest of it, so I had poured her cereal before I knew there was no more milk. I was irritated.
Because of that, he decided that today was a bad day to take the car to the mechanic's after all... I just said "whatever you want." I'm sort of over it.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
10 on Tuesday - Cell phones
1. What type of phone do you have? Do you like it?
I have an LG something. It's nice, but not overly fancy. I just like that it has a QWERTY keyboard.
2. How old were you when you got your first cell phone?
19 or so - when I started driving. I got into an accident shortly after I started driving and happened to still have my mom's phone in my purse from the night before when I'd gone out late in the evening. My mom bought me a cell phone a few days later.
3. How many cell phones have you owned since your first?
maybe 8?
4. How much is your average monthly phone bill?
I have no idea. Bad, I know, but my husband pays that bill.
5. When you were a kid/teenager, were you allowed to have a phone in your room?
Nope. I begged and pleaded.
6. Do you like talking on the phone or do you despise it? Or somewhere in-between?
Love it, although less now than I did as a teen.
7. Do you text a lot? Is texting/talking while driving illegal where you live? Are you guilty of it anyway?
I text a lot. It's not illegal where I live and I talk while driving a lot and have for years. I try not to text while actively driving - keep to stop lights, etc.
8. What sort of texting keyboard does your phone have? Touch screen, slide out, or something different? Do you care?
Slide out. Also touch screen, but if it's any length of a message, I use the slide out. A yes or no or 2-3 word answer can be done via touch.
9. Look at the last call in your call log – who is it? What were they calling about? Who calls you the most?
My best friend K. She called back after the Little Man had called her when playing with my phone. My husband calls me the most. Followed by my mom and then my best friend, K.
10. What is the longest phone call you can recall having?
3+ hours with my childhood best friend Katie B.
I have an LG something. It's nice, but not overly fancy. I just like that it has a QWERTY keyboard.
2. How old were you when you got your first cell phone?
19 or so - when I started driving. I got into an accident shortly after I started driving and happened to still have my mom's phone in my purse from the night before when I'd gone out late in the evening. My mom bought me a cell phone a few days later.
3. How many cell phones have you owned since your first?
maybe 8?
4. How much is your average monthly phone bill?
I have no idea. Bad, I know, but my husband pays that bill.
5. When you were a kid/teenager, were you allowed to have a phone in your room?
Nope. I begged and pleaded.
6. Do you like talking on the phone or do you despise it? Or somewhere in-between?
Love it, although less now than I did as a teen.
7. Do you text a lot? Is texting/talking while driving illegal where you live? Are you guilty of it anyway?
I text a lot. It's not illegal where I live and I talk while driving a lot and have for years. I try not to text while actively driving - keep to stop lights, etc.
8. What sort of texting keyboard does your phone have? Touch screen, slide out, or something different? Do you care?
Slide out. Also touch screen, but if it's any length of a message, I use the slide out. A yes or no or 2-3 word answer can be done via touch.
9. Look at the last call in your call log – who is it? What were they calling about? Who calls you the most?
My best friend K. She called back after the Little Man had called her when playing with my phone. My husband calls me the most. Followed by my mom and then my best friend, K.
10. What is the longest phone call you can recall having?
3+ hours with my childhood best friend Katie B.
Monday, June 6, 2011
What a pain in the tooth!
Oh goodness, my mouth hurts! I've got a couple of impacted wisdom teeth that are driving me crazy. The other night, I had pain bad enough to wake me up in the middle of the night and then, KEEP me awake. I raided an old pack of Baby Orajel to help me get back to sleep. I had to keep applying all weekend and now it's just a really, really uncomfortable pressure in my jaw.
Our benefits have all changed and I have no idea how to find out the info that I need to go see the dentist and hopefully get some relief. And the worst part of it is, even once I figure out my insurance issues, I'll still have to make an appointment, have a consult and then go back for the actual procedure, assuming that they want to pull the wisdom teeth, which I assume they will. So still gonna have to deal with this pain for awhile. Grrr.
In other news, the weekend was pleasant, tooth pain not withstanding. We spent the bulk of Saturday at my friend Rachel's wedding and I got to see a lot of old friends who are more like distant family. Fuss spent the day with her Aunt J and was, apparently, perfectly behaved. (This changed on Sunday - when we had problems over and over, but that seems to be the pattern lately - she spends a day with family and behaves amazingly well only to become a bratty child the next day with us.)
I'm hoping to be able to make some plans for this week, I but I have to get my dental issues dealt with/scheduled. I need to get out of the house. And I'm trying not to spend money.
Our benefits have all changed and I have no idea how to find out the info that I need to go see the dentist and hopefully get some relief. And the worst part of it is, even once I figure out my insurance issues, I'll still have to make an appointment, have a consult and then go back for the actual procedure, assuming that they want to pull the wisdom teeth, which I assume they will. So still gonna have to deal with this pain for awhile. Grrr.
In other news, the weekend was pleasant, tooth pain not withstanding. We spent the bulk of Saturday at my friend Rachel's wedding and I got to see a lot of old friends who are more like distant family. Fuss spent the day with her Aunt J and was, apparently, perfectly behaved. (This changed on Sunday - when we had problems over and over, but that seems to be the pattern lately - she spends a day with family and behaves amazingly well only to become a bratty child the next day with us.)
I'm hoping to be able to make some plans for this week, I but I have to get my dental issues dealt with/scheduled. I need to get out of the house. And I'm trying not to spend money.
Thursday, June 2, 2011
7 Quick Takes (sorry for all the lists lately)
1. Wedding this weekend. Looking forward to it. Looking forward to leaving Fuss with her Aunt J and Oma. She's been a real handful lately. She's a joy one minute and a dramatic, whiny pill the next. So we could use a little break from each other.
2. The Little Man had his 9-month well-baby check up yesterday and he's in the 50th percentile for head, height, and weight. He also has his Daddy's flat feet that we want to keep our eye on. He got one shot and has been fussy, but hopefully tonight will be better than the last few.
3. I'm more than 2 weeks late on my period. I'm still getting negative HPTs and it's probably just the nursing messing with my hormones or something, but seriously? I have never wanted my period to just DO something already.
4. Things are tight financially these days... and when I'm stressed, I want retail therapy, which is, in turn, causing a little more stressed.
5. I LOVE online shopping. But it's causing me some difficulties. I can find all these wonderful things without even having to drag the kids to the stores, but I can't actually buy the things I find, even when they are a GREAT deal.
6. I think I might love tickling and kissing and hugging my kids more than anything in the world. Seriously. They are both so much fun to cuddle and squeeze. And it gives me great joy to hear them laugh and giggle over and over again.
7. My SIL is in Aruba with one girlfriend and a cell phone without service. I know she's a big girl, but the idea of that terrifies me. I never, ever would have done that. Maybe I have no sense of adventure (and of course, I don't even have a passport. The furthest I've been is Canada and they didn't require passports back then, so obviously I'm not very adventurous.)
2. The Little Man had his 9-month well-baby check up yesterday and he's in the 50th percentile for head, height, and weight. He also has his Daddy's flat feet that we want to keep our eye on. He got one shot and has been fussy, but hopefully tonight will be better than the last few.
3. I'm more than 2 weeks late on my period. I'm still getting negative HPTs and it's probably just the nursing messing with my hormones or something, but seriously? I have never wanted my period to just DO something already.
4. Things are tight financially these days... and when I'm stressed, I want retail therapy, which is, in turn, causing a little more stressed.
5. I LOVE online shopping. But it's causing me some difficulties. I can find all these wonderful things without even having to drag the kids to the stores, but I can't actually buy the things I find, even when they are a GREAT deal.
6. I think I might love tickling and kissing and hugging my kids more than anything in the world. Seriously. They are both so much fun to cuddle and squeeze. And it gives me great joy to hear them laugh and giggle over and over again.
7. My SIL is in Aruba with one girlfriend and a cell phone without service. I know she's a big girl, but the idea of that terrifies me. I never, ever would have done that. Maybe I have no sense of adventure (and of course, I don't even have a passport. The furthest I've been is Canada and they didn't require passports back then, so obviously I'm not very adventurous.)
Stream of consciousness
My baby boy is 9 months old today. Wild.
He's been SO fussy today. After a bad night's sleep last night and then a vaccination this morning, I suppose that is to be expected.
+I'm cranky. This is also to be expected after a bad night's sleep (see above), but oh my goodness am I tired and frustrated and irritated, etc. I hate being this way.
My husband's cousin's wife - I love her dearly. She has a 4 year old son, but has struggled with secondary infertility for the last couple of years. They just tried their first IUI and are on the 2 week wait. I am praying for her fervently. Thankfully, they have plenty of money and can afford a few treatments. But of course, that doesn't account for the emotional strain, etc.
My brain isn't working well today, so this post is horribly written and all over the place. Ugh.
He's been SO fussy today. After a bad night's sleep last night and then a vaccination this morning, I suppose that is to be expected.
+I'm cranky. This is also to be expected after a bad night's sleep (see above), but oh my goodness am I tired and frustrated and irritated, etc. I hate being this way.
My husband's cousin's wife - I love her dearly. She has a 4 year old son, but has struggled with secondary infertility for the last couple of years. They just tried their first IUI and are on the 2 week wait. I am praying for her fervently. Thankfully, they have plenty of money and can afford a few treatments. But of course, that doesn't account for the emotional strain, etc.
My brain isn't working well today, so this post is horribly written and all over the place. Ugh.
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
10 on Tuesday on Wednesday (again)
1. From your childhood, what do you miss most about summer vacation?
Vacations. My mom and I (and my grandparents, usually) always went on a trip of some sort for a week or more. We can't afford to do that right now, but I loved it.
2. Are you going anywhere on vacation this summer?
Nope. we were going to go visit family in AL, but now we can't afford to go (gas is SO expensive and we just spent all our savings on the darn car)
3. What foods do you like to barbecue?
Well, I used to hate to BBQ, but I've found some other styles of BBQ sauce that I enjoy (I can't stand standard KC-style BBQ sauce - too sweet). We BBQ ribs and chicken.
4. How do you celebrate the fourth of July?
The last few years have involved a party at my friend Cherry's parents beach condo and then a trip outside to watch the fireworks on the beach.
5. What’s your favorite beverage to drink in the summertime?
Lemonade. And margaritas. (but I like those year round)
6. What movie are you looking forward to seeing this summer?
Something Borrowed? I dunno. I haven't been paying attention to what is coming out.
7. In the car: windows down or AC?
AC. I get headaches from the constant road noise.
8. Have you ever had a summer fling?
Nope.
9. Do you wear sunscreen?
I am a pale, freckled red-head. If I don't wear sunscreen, I become a walking lobster. I don't tan.
10. Do you have any favorite summertime activities?
Swimming.
Vacations. My mom and I (and my grandparents, usually) always went on a trip of some sort for a week or more. We can't afford to do that right now, but I loved it.
2. Are you going anywhere on vacation this summer?
Nope. we were going to go visit family in AL, but now we can't afford to go (gas is SO expensive and we just spent all our savings on the darn car)
3. What foods do you like to barbecue?
Well, I used to hate to BBQ, but I've found some other styles of BBQ sauce that I enjoy (I can't stand standard KC-style BBQ sauce - too sweet). We BBQ ribs and chicken.
4. How do you celebrate the fourth of July?
The last few years have involved a party at my friend Cherry's parents beach condo and then a trip outside to watch the fireworks on the beach.
5. What’s your favorite beverage to drink in the summertime?
Lemonade. And margaritas. (but I like those year round)
6. What movie are you looking forward to seeing this summer?
Something Borrowed? I dunno. I haven't been paying attention to what is coming out.
7. In the car: windows down or AC?
AC. I get headaches from the constant road noise.
8. Have you ever had a summer fling?
Nope.
9. Do you wear sunscreen?
I am a pale, freckled red-head. If I don't wear sunscreen, I become a walking lobster. I don't tan.
10. Do you have any favorite summertime activities?
Swimming.
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