1. I am completely overwhelmed this week with having a sick kid (especially since I was concerned about the cause and she's been back and forth to the doctor's several times), having a 2-year-old, trying to keep up with even a modicum of the housework, and just being tired from lack of good sleep and being pregnant.
2. This terrifies me because having 2 kids in the house isn't going to make anything easier. I know the sleep is going to get screwed up and I wont be able to "sleep when the baby sleeps" when Fuss is awake. And heaven help me if one of them gets sick and gives it to the other.
3. I am completely freaking out that I wont be able to care for both kids sufficiently. I have begged my husband to come home early nearly every day this week - not something he can do on a regular basis, of course. I had this thought today that there was no way this was going to work.
4. I need a nanny or a mothers helper or something. And that is most certainly not in the budget.
5. So many other people do this - and do this with kids closer together in age - and do it better than I can with only one!
6. I haven't had these feelings since I was 3 days post-partum. I haven't actually had the thought that someone was going to take away my children from me (as I did then) because I am a bad mother, but I've had the thought of "what do I do if I really can't do this? What happens if I fail?"
7. Fuss was a reasonably easy baby. She was a good sleeper who put herself on a schedule easily, she ate well once we got the breast-feeding well established. And they say that so often first and second children are polar opposites when it comes to the basics - does that mean I'm doomed to have a difficult 2nd baby? That overwhelms me even more.
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