I have been very distressed and anxious about this pregnancy. I can't get through it, sometimes and it is negatively effecting my mood - I am easily agitated and irritated, which is not a good idea under any circumstances, but when you are the primary care giver to a toddler, it's especially bad.
The thing is, I originally wanted to make my appointment for later than the one they gave me, but when this was available, I took it. And then I had it in my head that I was going to know if this pregnancy was viable at this appointment. And that I don't, well, I think it's making me crazier.
Part of it is my family history, part of it is my awareness of all of the infertility problems. When I started reading blogs, I started reading IF blogs and while all of the women I follow have since had children, there is a lot of sad stories out there. Sometimes I feel like I've had it too easy. My first pregnancy was conceived in 6 months and I didn't have much trouble during my 9 months and despite the fact that she was a big baby, I didn't even have a hard delivery.
So, why should I expect it to be easy this time around? I don't. But sometimes I wonder if I'm making more out of it than I should. I'm probably worrying for nothing.
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