Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Falling flat

In-laws. Can’t live with them (thank heaven!) and are really glad you don’t have to.

We told my MIL, grandmother-IL and the 2 younger SILs our happy news last night. It took Mr. Moose awhile to get up to it, he was trying to set them up to ask questions about something and it didn’t work the way he planned. But when he did, the reaction was less ecstatic than I had hoped.

I think I’ve mentioned that my older SIL, L, who lives out of state is trying to get pg, but has PCOS. They have been trying for a year with no success as of yet. She is the oldest member of the family and always expected to be the first to get married and have a baby, etc. That makes sense, but in this case, Mr. Moose and I got engaged first (though she got married about 10 weeks before us) and we’re obviously having a baby first. While I hope her infertility is resolved in the near future, I personally don’t feel that her desire to have a child should lessen mine or my joy of being pregnant in any way.

When Mr. Moose announced our good news, the first reaction was in sympathy for older SIL L. (I think I’ll call her LB from now on so as not to confuse her with younger sister LP.) The statement “LB wanted to have the first grandchild” actually came up, they were appalled that we hadn’t told her yet (um, why would we tell her before we told his mom?) and J actually made a comment about “defending LB’s cause”. What?! This is a BABY. A Bundle of joy. One they will actually get to see regularly (as opposed to one who will live out of state). We’ve been married nearly as long, we have a house, steady jobs, what’s the issue? We desperately want this child. Why does it matter in what order it comes to LB’s potential child? It took nearly 45 minutes for my MIL to get up and come over and hug us (a very tense 45 minutes where my usually quiet self got a little defensive and I nearly left the room) and it took about 2 full hours to hear the first “Congratulations” out of any of them (LP was the first to say something, though by then they had finally all made positive and potentially excited comments.)

I will admit, though, that part of me hopes that LB doesn’t get pregnant for at least another few months now, since I don’t want to deal with the immediate competition of having babies just a few weeks apart.

I don’t know why this is bothering me so much – I know they’ve never been my number one fans and this shouldn’t be any different. I just assumed that providing them with a baby to love on (they go gaga over their cousin’s babies and friends babies) might actually be a good thing.

I’ve had some mild nausea the last day or so, with increasing intensity and frequency. I kinda feel like I just want to get it over with – if you’re going to throw up, why not just do it instead of making me run to the bathroom and nothing happening.

Update: MIL claims she assumed he would tell LB right away because they were close as kids. Um, yeah, but why logically would we tell her before we told his mom? She also claims she is excited, but she’s just not sure she is ready to be a grandmother. My question is: would she be ready to be a grandmother for LB’s child?

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