Thursday, November 29, 2007

On Parenting and Birth

It’s interesting reading parenting articles/opinions on the major things from sleeping to children’s toys lately, etc. I find that I do actually have fairly strong opinions on many things that parents do and I’m not even truly sure where they come from.

On sleeping – I’ve read several books that run the gamut, and I’ve read a few blogs that mention other things. I don’t like the idea of “the family bed” for a myriad of reasons, all of them my personal tastes and personality. I have no issue with someone else doing it if it works for them, but I don’t plan to try it with my own kid. One reason is a practical reason that, even though babies don’t take up much space, it already feels as if our bed is pretty crowded with just Mr. Moose and myself and another reason (that partially tacks onto that one) is that I KNOW I wouldn’t sleep well for fear of rolling onto the baby/smothering her with blankets and pillows, etc. We plan to have the bassinet/pack’n’play next to the bed for the first little while that we bring the baby home, and gradually move her to her room and crib over time. The long-term plan may or may not work, but that’s where I’m starting.

Eating – I’ve mentioned before the distress I feel when I hear other mom’s talking about nursing their 4-year-olds. This disturbs me to no end, though I suppose there is a chance that I might change my mind once I really know what to expect from nursing, but somehow I doubt it.

CIO/FIO – It’s interesting to hear the opinions on this from the internet. I was always told that a baby shouldn’t be picked up the moment that she fusses even a bit so she doesn’t learn to expect that treatment when it’s not practical (like when you’re in the car during rush hour with no way to pull over right away, etc.), but I also know that I could never handle hearing my nephew cry for very long, so I can only imagine what it will do to my heart to hear my own baby crying from frustration if I am trying the CIO theory. So, probably not. (I know to never say never in these situations). I like what The Baby Whisperer suggests which is to pick up the baby when she cries, but as soon as she settles, to put her back down in her crib (in a “it’s time to sleep” situation) and continue to pick her up each time she begins to cry again, but to immediately put her down when she settles. She says that it may take awhile – 30 times in a night the first night, and usually decreasing times in subsequent nights – but that eventually she will learn that you will always come when needed, and there is no reason to fret. But it might not work, and I’m prepared to adjust if necessary.

Lately, I’ve been having more anxiety over impending labor – we went to our first childbirthing class the other night and I watched a video. I turned to Mr. Moose afterwards and said “do you seriously think I can do that?” He assured me that I could, but I am doubtful. I want to go into labor naturally, if possible, but I’m scared of laboring at home for very long, and yet don’t want to be sent home because it’s too early. I’d be willing to schedule an induction, but I’ve heard that inductions usually make it worse and so I don’t want to deal with that, either. I also want this baby out as soon as possible, safely. I don’t want to be one of those moms who is still waiting 2 weeks after her due date. I don’t know that I can handle emotionally or physically a long 20-hour labor. I know they say that you can handle anything is necessary, but I just cannot picture myself going through all that and not begging for a c-section by hour #8. I’ll be labeled “that wussy mom in room 208”, but I really won’t care. Seriously, though. I know when I first got pregnant and read in my books on pregnancy about labor that I was intimidated. Isn’t everyone? But I think I’m more freaked out the closer I get to the point where I’m actually going to have to go through it. For awhile the idea of stretching that far out creeped me out – now it’s less about that, and more about the ability to actually deal with labor and physically be capable of pushing her out of my body. I have never been strong, ,or athletic or had much stamina for any physical activity – ever. So a long labor? I seriously think it would kill me. And I’m scared of the feelings of her crowning, of the possibility of ripping, etc. Okay, now I have to stop talking about this or I’m going to have a panic attack. And I’m at the office, so that’s not a good idea. ☺

No comments:

Post a Comment