A very whiny 37 weeks

I have had a rough pregnancy. No energy. Pain. Nausea that began before the stick got 2 lines and ended only briefly well after the midway point only to return again when I was too large to lean over the toilet when necessary. Six colds in 9 months. Yeah, 6. And now those darn contractions that hurt, take my breath away, come on suddenly and randomly, sometimes way too close only to go away just about the time I'm thinking "hmm, maybe this is it."

There's been good stuff, too, but on a day like today (officially 37 weeks), I can't think of too many of them.
Today, I have had so many contractions that I periodically wonder if this is really just ONE incredibly long contraction and I'm just breathing easier through it at certain points. They have no rhythm, though and most of the time I can talk through the discomfort, so... Every freaking time I move - stand up, sit down, lay down, etc. I get hit with one. And then there is the tightness and pain in my lower back and hips. Seriously, I'm both waddling and limping because I can hardly move.

And today Little Man decided to come down with some sort of complication to his runny nose/mild cough we've been dealing with for a week. After he seemed like he was getting better. Today, he is screaming, telling me his face hurts or his ear hurts, that "he can't" do anything I ask him to do (lay down, swallow medicine, put the warm compress on his ear... despite the fact that all these things are JUST TO MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER.

Do you know how many times I've had to carry him in the last 48-hours? His compact, but solid, 33 lb little body? I can barely walk straight without him in my arms, and he wants/needs to be carried? I feel like I'm going to break. Like in half.

1000 posts

I just looked at the counter on my blog and noticed that I have 999 posts. So this one is 1000. I remember thinking "I should do something special for my 1000th post" and then more than a month went by and I have got nothing. Oops.

So, welcome to what could potentially be the world's most boring 1000th post. But any post is better than none, yes? Especially since I sort of use this blog as my memory keeper.

I am 32+ weeks pregnant. With my first 2 pregnancies I knew exactly how far along I was at all times. Someone would ask me and I could rattle off "22 weeks, 3 days" or whatever in a matter of seconds. Somewhere along the way, though, I decided that was weird and I'd stick to just the weeks when I answered "oh, about 22 weeks," but I always knew. I even corrected my OB a time or two.

This time, I'm aware, but not as aware. And this past weekend when I was turning 32 weeks? I actually thought I was 33. So, oops! I am counting down the days because I am feeling particularly HUGE and uncomfortable these days. I have no desire for her to arrive TOO early, but if time could fly (I'm sure it will, this being the Christmas holidays and all) I sure would appreciate it!

I am assured by my friends and husband that I am NOT looking as corpulent as I feel. (I feel like a Hippopotomus. A Preggo-potomus if you will.) I am told I look like I'm trying to smuggle a basketball under my shirt. I have gained approximately 9 lbs and hit the dreaded number I never wanted to go over. (My skinny friend uses said number as her example of a really large person and I finally told her "could you tone it down or add 50 pounds because I am rapidly approaching that number and you're making me feel really huge.") I knew I probably would, as I was rather overweight when I started this venture, but I am hopeful that I will remain under 20 lbs gained as I have in the past and be able to shed it pretty well in the early days of postpartum.

I can't bend over anymore. There is just too much baby in my belly. I have trouble sitting leaning forward, too. (Last night, you should have seen me trying to eat my dinner. I ended up leaning back in my recliner and using my belly as a shelf to set my plate on because I could only take about 2 bites before I would have to sit back.) I had to slide my driving seat's back back a notch because I was sitting up too straight while driving and there was too much pressure. I don't remember having to adjust quite as much with previous pregnancies. I think I might be carrying lower? I don't know. She also spends a lot of time tapping my bladder, so I feel like I'm always in the bathroom.

The headaches have started up again in the last week or so. They aren't usually migraine strength, but they are persistent and annoying.

I have been ladybug shopping online like a crazy person. I have pinned and tagged and registered for and watched what feels like every cute ladybug outfit and accessory on the internet (and I know I'm missing things.) I put a lot of thought into her going home outfit - odd, since I favored practicality over appearance with both of my previous babies - and finally have it picked and ordered. It isn't completely unpractical, but seriously, I went for cute, but primarily functional with both of the previous babies. I got lucky and had a decent order for my Thirty-One business last month and got a commission check last week which has covered all my baby-clothes costs to date. (and she actually needed a bunch of the smaller sized clothes since half of Fuss's seem to be missing.)

I am also noticing the nesting tendancies come out. I arrived home from dropping Fuss off at school this morning to notice how filthy my front door looked. I then spent 10 minuted cleaning it with furniture polish. Now I want to paint it because it has seen better days. But I know I don't actually have the time or energy for that. I have been very focused on reorganizing, clearing out and straightening up around the house, but this is hampered at this point by not being able to bend anymore! I did FINALLY get the kids' room reorganized this weekend (I am THRILLED!) And I'm hoping to get more work done in the nursery beginning this coming weekend (although, it is already looking better than it was a month ago thanks to the work I've already done.) I have on Daddy Fuss's To Do list this weekend raising the crib mattress so I can start putting that together. I cannot wait to see how beautiful the cute ladybug bedding I scored looks in there! The weekend after Christmas has already been mentally scheduled for more intensive baby-prep - pulling the bassinet out of the garage and wiping it down and setting it up for her pending arrival.

We still have no dishwasher which is bugging me.

I leave you with this adorable picture of two very sweet and cute kids that is the wallpaper on my phone. I just can't resist their cute smiles!

Confession and self-awareness

I think we all know I am not a good housekeeper. I have been working on it, but it just isn't ingrained in me. I get frustrated by the mess, though. That usually motivates me to action, but during this pregnancy, I haven't had the energy. I had a good dose of energy over the weekend though and got a lot done. I had intended to do a lot more today, but I feel like my day is already falling apart. And I have figured out that my way of coping with stress is to hide and avoid all other stressors, too. Sometimes this includes my kids. Which is awful, I know. But just a few moments ago, I found myself hiding in my room with a book while my son watches Netflix in the other room because I got stressed this morning and overwhelmed.

Avoiding housework isn't helping my situation, since having such a messy house is adding to my stress.