Showing posts with label Pregnancy #4. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Pregnancy #4. Show all posts

Friday, January 3, 2014

A very whiny 37 weeks

I have had a rough pregnancy. No energy. Pain. Nausea that began before the stick got 2 lines and ended only briefly well after the midway point only to return again when I was too large to lean over the toilet when necessary. Six colds in 9 months. Yeah, 6. And now those darn contractions that hurt, take my breath away, come on suddenly and randomly, sometimes way too close only to go away just about the time I'm thinking "hmm, maybe this is it."

There's been good stuff, too, but on a day like today (officially 37 weeks), I can't think of too many of them.
Today, I have had so many contractions that I periodically wonder if this is really just ONE incredibly long contraction and I'm just breathing easier through it at certain points. They have no rhythm, though and most of the time I can talk through the discomfort, so... Every freaking time I move - stand up, sit down, lay down, etc. I get hit with one. And then there is the tightness and pain in my lower back and hips. Seriously, I'm both waddling and limping because I can hardly move.

And today Little Man decided to come down with some sort of complication to his runny nose/mild cough we've been dealing with for a week. After he seemed like he was getting better. Today, he is screaming, telling me his face hurts or his ear hurts, that "he can't" do anything I ask him to do (lay down, swallow medicine, put the warm compress on his ear... despite the fact that all these things are JUST TO MAKE HIM FEEL BETTER.

Do you know how many times I've had to carry him in the last 48-hours? His compact, but solid, 33 lb little body? I can barely walk straight without him in my arms, and he wants/needs to be carried? I feel like I'm going to break. Like in half.


Friday, September 27, 2013

Baby, baby, baby

This has been a rough week. Monday, I threw up two times before getting out the door to drop off Fuss at 8am.  I spend most of Tuesday contracting - just not enough to call the doctor. (they say call if you get 7 or more in an hour. I was more like 4-5/hour, but they weren't in any sort of pattern) Some were bad, painful and caused me to stop and need to focus on my breathing. Those ones often caused horrible back pain as well. Most were not that bad, just annoying. I put my feet up and drank lots of water (something I'd been slacking on lately) which would make them stop, but then getting up and moving around a lot again would bring them back. Wednesday brought on much fewer contractions, but lots more round ligament and back pain. I will be glad when this week is over!

I've often said I don't do pregnancy well, but I like the end result (a brand-new, squishy, sweet baby) but I feel every ache, pain, and change in my body as I go through pregnancy. It is all worth it in the end (and I tend to get that wonderful thing called pregnancy amnesia and forget all the hard parts!) but somehow it seems like I'm already (23 weeks tomorrow!) ready for it to be over. :) (do not get me wrong, I don't want her to come this early. Neither she nor I are actually ready for her to come, but part of me wishes I could just fast forward through the next few months, get everything done and ready and not have to focus on the creeping by of the days!)

I managed to score some amazingly beautiful baby bedding at a consignment sale and I'm so excited to start work on the nursery now that I've cleared out some stuff (boy baby clothes) I've been saving. I need to do a lot more clearing, but I am very excited and motivated to do that and get moving in the right direction to set up the space for this baby - and have it done early for once. (both previous pregnancies, I had no way to get their spaces done very far in advance because I was waiting on other people to do big things like painting and building our 3rd bedroom)


Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Pregnancy Update

Blah. In the past week, the daily, repeated nausea and gagging have lessened immensely, but I've randomly thrown up twice. Both times with uncomfortable stomachs immediately prior (so I have a little warning) but with no apparent REASON behind it (not actually sick, didn't really eat anything funny, motion sickness, etc.). I've had a few random gagging episodes, but they are much fewer and farther between now, so really, I'm not complaining too much. Anything to get through this morning sickness. I know that some have it much worse - I had a friend who had to be hospitalized for dehydration during her 2nd pregnancy due to the extremeness of her morning sickness - but this has certainly been the worse of the 3 for me and I really don't like it.

In more happy news, I've been feeling her kick a LOT more lately (she does NOT like to be squished, for example), but it's not quite strong enough yet to feel outside my stomach, so no one else has yet had the pleasure. (Fuss is dying to feel the baby kick.) The occasional contraction have also begun to be more apparent, but nothing I can't handle and when they get real intense, I know I've done too much for the day and I sit down and put my feet up and drink a glass of water and all is well.

I've also been a lot more gassy than I remember in the past. Actually, funny story, the other night my stomach was feeling so tight and painful and it felt like really strong contractions. Not like 8cm dilated, but certainly a lot stronger than I felt I should be feeling at 21 weeks along. It was the middle of the night and I had just put Little Man back to bed AGAIN and I was really hurting. I was worried. Running though my head "should I wake up my husband? Do I call the Dr's service? They're just going to tell me to go get checked out at the hospital. Which mom should we call to watch the kids while we go?" And then, I discovered it was gas. A LOT of gas, but just gas. Oops. Good thing I didn't go to all the trouble of waking anybody up!



Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Name and Dog - not naming the dog

I'm still dealing with naming drama from the in-laws over here. And I still haven't told my dad the baby's name. I'm ready to just say "SHUT UP! This is her name. Take it, like it, embrace it, or DON'T TALK TO or ABOUT her!" One of the other SILs made a joking comment the other day and I got really sensitive about it. My logical side knows she probably was just joking. But people thinking that they have any say in what we name our child is really pissing me off.

Right now, I'm still waffling on the middle name. The original one we picked (and announced) was simple, short, sweet and pretty much accomplished our initial plan without any frills. The alternative I'm considering is longer, frillier, fancier. It's almost like choosing a tomboy vs. a girly-girl name. They accomplish the same thing (putting all the initials together to represent each of my SILs and our grandmothers who also have the same initials) but it's the debate of the more frilly or the simple. And since the first name can go either way really (I've seen both girly-girls with this name and also tomboy/athletes) I'm trying to figure out how I want it portrayed.

In other news, I have finally had it with my dog. He's not a bad fellow, but he tends to pee in inopportune places (or poo in more extreme cases) when I'm not giving him enough or immediate attention (like at 3am when we're sleeping or when we're not home.) And we have had a bug problem since before we moved here, but it's gotten worse with our rather large backyard that seems to be a bug-haven. I have no energy to put into spending time with this dog, so he gets ignored a lot (unless Little Man is following him around the house to "pet" him.) and he really deserves a better life. I have tried to find him a home. He's good with kids, in that he doesn't bite or react to them when they mess with him, but he's older (13) and isn't really a playful sort, so he's not the type that a kid can play games with or whatever. He'd be a great companion to an older person who likes to occasionally take leisurely walks, but mostly likes to sit on the couch and knit/read/watch TV and might want to give a nice dog some behind-the-ears scratches while he or she does that.

Since I've had no luck with finding him a home via my friends, family, or acquaintances, I'm ready to take him to a shelter. It's a decision I've struggled with - he's old enough that it might not be easy for even THEM to find him a home and then... well, I try not to think about what might happen if they cannot place him. But I finally came to this decision and now my husband is dragging his feet.

And my husband is awesome, don't get me wrong. But I'm the one who has to deal with the dog every day. I'm the one who threw up on the front stoop the other day while cleaning up a particularly gross temper-tantrum display. And then there was the 2 days we had to close the door to the nursery (really only used at this point for diaper changes - I had to remove the diapers and wipes, etc. to change Little Man in the Living Room) before my husband could get to cleaning up the most recent tantrum the dog threw. (All over the freaking floor in there. I couldn't do it. So gross. Human bodily fluids are bad enough.) (Even now, thinking about it, I'm gagging at the computer.)

I cannot do this anymore. I can't have 2 active children, a baby in utero who seems determined to wear me out even BEFORE she arrives AND a dog who is too impatient at times to wait a little longer to go outside. (Oh, and he's a wuss, so if it's raining or wet grass in the back yard, he has made it habit to attempt to do his business in my laundry room. Also a major problem contributing - though not solely responsible for - to my falling behind on the laundry.)

Friday, June 21, 2013

Pregnancy comparisons

In being nearly 9 weeks pregnant, I find that I am still incredibly aware of my own body and I notice all the changes. This isn't surprising, in that I felt that way during both of my prior pregnancies, but I guess, maybe I figured I'd be more "chill" by the time I hit my third. But apparently not.

This time, I'm dealing with an issue of high blood pressure having recently been diagnosed (okay, technically, they were staying away from an official diagnosis, hoping that it was temporary or something) with hypertension. My Nephrologist's hope that the changes in body chemistry when I got pregnant might cause my pressure to DROP did not happen and now, here I am, on daily BP-lowering meds. (pause while I go take my morning dose).

I've had 4 (including this one and the one that ended before 8 weeks) pregnancies and none have been the same. Prior to this one, i would have said that my first and third pregnancies were so very different because I had a girl and a boy and so of course my hormones did different things to my body! But this one? Well, it has to be either a boy or a girl (we've confirmed that it is, in fact, only ONE baby) and I guess I assumed that my symptoms (specifically my morning sickness) would mirror one of the previous experiences. Not so much.

With Fuss, beginning around 8 weeks until about 16 (and then occasionally, but not daily until 18 weeks) I threw up daily. Once in the shower before I'd had the chance to have my breakfast and at least once while at work. Every day. But then I'd feel better and only the extreme cases of a certain scent or other type of trigger would stir my stomach later in the day and that was rare.


With Little Man, I rarely actually threw up. Maybe a handful of times. But from 8 weeks until about 16 weeks, I just went about in a state of mild nausea from about 7am to 4pm. (this made it difficult for me to be interested in any food early in the day, a problem that as a mom, I already struggled with since the mornings tended to get busy and I was focused on getting us ready for the day and not eating breakfast. But I needed to eat or the nausea was worse. Vicious cycle.)

This time, my first bout of nausea started at 5 weeks. Before I was even sure I was pregnant. And since then, it's been a random smattering of violent retching - some days it happens rarely, if at all and is concentrated in the morning before I've eaten. If I stay on top of my meals and snacks, I feel fine for most of the day. Other days, it feels like my body is bound and determined to make me gag repeatedly until I'd almost BEG for something to actually come up. And this isn't all focused on the first part of the day - oh no, I can feel the need to make scary noises from my throat as late as when I'm getting ready for bed at night! It's always worse and more concentrated in the morning, but the random waves of it can happen any time and without any triggers I'm aware of thus far. Sure, when the dog made a mess on Fuss's bedroom floor I had to gag my way through cleaning it up and it was awful, but the other night I was picked up a Key Lime Pie from the local grocery store for a Family Dinner dessert and I randomly thought I was going to lose it in the middle of the bakery. No idea what caused it, since the idea of Key Lime Pie or chocolate cupcakes continued to appeal, even after I composed myself.

The headaches have started again. This could be, in part, due to the fact that I've cut back my caffeine intake noticeably, or it could be the blood pressure causing it, or it could be just the usual major changes in hormones. Who knows?

I'm wearing maternity clothes, but then, this is no big shocker. I remember buying my first pair of maternity pants at 7 1/2 weeks when I was pregnant with Fuss. I hate tight clothing, so the invention of elastic waistband pants for the eternally bloated and growing pregnant woman is a beautiful thing. My best friend had given me back the tubs of "our" maternity clothes just a month or so before I got pregnant (between us, this will be the 6th child, but we've never been pregnant at the same time, so we've just shared the clothes we've amassed back and forth each time we have a baby. Another friend or two have also borrowed, but these are primarily OURS.)

I'm tired all the time. When I was pregnant with Fuss, I was working out of the home full-time and I couldn't really rest during the day. I'd come home each night and pass out on the couch while my husband made dinner, wake up, have dinner, watch some TV and fall into a deep sleep wakened only by my persistent bladder.

When I was pregnant with Little Man, Fuss was still taking a daily nap and I, too, could get in some sleep while she slept. I took a nap almost daily. This allowed me to be a little more alive in the evenings when it came to hanging out with my husband. That made things a lot easier.

Now, I have one child who naps and one who doesn't. Occasionally, I can get a nap while Little Man naps and Fuss will leave me alone while she enjoys quiet time with the sole control of the Netflix remote. Often, however, she tends to come bother me every 15 minutes with requests for snacks or drink refills or hugs.  This makes me grouchy and I've been teaching her to be more independent with instructions like "if you can't get it yourself, you can't have it."

With my 2nd pregnancy, I didn't make it to 8 weeks, where typically my nausea begins. I was slipping on the occasional pair of maternity pants, but still fitting in most of my regular stuff. I don't remember if the tiredness had started yet, but I remember a feeling of this pregnancy being "off" from the get-go. Something wasn't right, so maybe I knew subconsciously that it wouldn't last, despite my cautious hope that it would.

I'm already playing the naming game with my husband this time. We have a name picked out for a girl (we've had it for a very long time now and we're still in love with it) but while we did have a boys name, I'm less in love with it than I was 3 years ago and I've kind of gone back to the drawing board. It's funny, because some of the names I'd rejected due to an increase in popularity I'm coming back to because I just like them so much now. We shall see.






Saturday, May 25, 2013

Hello in there!

Timidly peeking into the empty room. It seems like it echos in here.

It's been so long (more than a month) since I was here, writing, and even more so since I was terribly active at it, but I'm ready to get back to it. I've been working this week on my novel again and I'm motivated - just in time for summer to begin and other big changes in my life!

Only a few people know this, but I just found out I'm 5 weeks pregnant. (And most of those who DO know are my Luckies - and they wouldn't tell a soul.)

I spent a day being a little giddy every time I thought about it. My husband had a very good reaction to the news (unlike the last time we had a scare a few months ago - oh the difference a few months makes!) and I'm debating on telling my mom soon or not (she has a tendency of not being able to keep her mouth shut about things) and surprisingly, my husband even said he nearly told one of my best friends (who works with him at his office) yesterday, but he said he'd let me share the news.

Today, I've found myself looking up articles on the things to avoid during pregnancy (just to refresh my memory), playing with the Baby Name Voyager to see the popularity of the names we like, and "Windows" shopping Motherhood.com to see what is out there in maternity clothes these days... (though my BFF just gave me back our shared wardrobe of maternity clothes a couple of months ago since her husband finally said "no more kids!" and got his vasectomy.) I need to go through the collection, since it's been nearly 3 years since I was last pregnant. (Hard to believe Little Man is going to be THREE at the end of the summer!)

I know we'll be telling the immediate family (my parents, my SILs and MIL) in the next couple of weeks. We're going to be traveling soon to see SIL and her family and another SIL is moving out of state in about a month. (which makes me so sad that she won't be here for this baby!)

I've already found myself blaming the pregnancy on certain symptoms that may or may not be pregnancy related - my fatigue, my headaches. But then, I've been feeling fatigued for weeks and weeks, so it may just be coincidence.

I'm so excited. This new little Squishy is going to be a big change, but an exciting one! I think Fuss is going to be an amazing Big Sister again and Little Man... he likes babies. It will be really interesting to see how he reacts to NOT being the baby anymore.